Failure

How many times in how many ways do you have to fail? Can you handle it? Can you persevere and come out on top? Can you come out at all? 

Sometimes I feel like the emotions that come along with throwing my heart into something, only to completely and utterly fail,  grab a hold of my throat, block my precious air tunnels, and suffocate the small flame that kept my soul on fire.  

This, this is the same flame that at the beginning of my journey was ablaze!  It made me a dangerous weapon, a force to be reckoned with, ready for battle, intent on destruction, and content with nothing less than the best I had ever given. 

Its no wonder to me that when people show such loyalty to the task at hand , that to  fail, not only looks and feels like failure, but they can literally taste the sickly sour flavor that can so easily turn into a permanent staunch on your soul.  

Your soul, it needs oxygen! Fire can't exist without it and at some point you will have to allow your soul to com-bust again into flame.  You will, again, find the passion that is such a beautiful part of life.  

God asks us to be perfect, so why then do we have to fail? what I forget so often is that the perfection he is asking of all of us isn't in our everyday tasks, work, school, relationships, etc.  He wants our hearts to be perfect. He wants our souls to be on fire with a passion for the good.  He wants to use the inevitable process of failure to teach us how to get one step closer to perfection, which to me, sounds a whole heap better than failure.  

Perfection to you sounds boring?  If it didn't put one more rock in my backpack labeled failure I'd bet you that neither of us will know what perfection feels like in this life anyway.  

How do we pick ourselves up after one of these complete and utter failures?

 My Immediate, favorite, and most ineffective way of handling failure  is what call "photo synthesizing" aka sleeping in the sun with my arms and legs spread starfish style.  

(Yes I know I'm not a plant)

Note: long term this will get you no where

This is my method of clearing my head.  Anything to clear the mind and gain perspective helps me prepare my heart and get me ready to once again fan the flame.  

The only thing I feel left to do is dive right back in, with even more of your heart, even if it feels impossible.   Burn so bright that you can light up the lives you touch on your own little journey!

The End